*this piece originally appeared at truthout (with special thanks to Editor Maya Schenwar)
By Molly Rowan Leach, Founder of Restorative Justice on The Rise
In 1995 my mother went into full blown psychosis as a result of a drastic change in the medication she was taking for schizo-affective disorder. She lured some of our friends and neighbors into our home and took the youngest, a toddler, into the basement bedroom. Once there, she slashed the child’s throat with a knife because of a voice telling her she had to. The toddler survived despite a massive loss of blood.
Mom had suffered from mental illness for most of her life in some form or another, and her new doctor at that time had reduced her antipsychotic medication without monitoring the effects. She had tried to take her own life after I was born, so afraid of being a bad mother that she thought it would be better if she exited, but I had no idea that she was managing life with depression that turned into bipolar disorder in my teens. She never harmed me. Quite the opposite — I was loved and supported by both my parents. But I do remember, and live with, the stigma that surrounds people with mental illness and everyone who loves them.
After the attack my mother was arrested, obliterated out of her mind. The media went wild, and she became the town monster. The magnitude of what she had done and the fear it elicited was everywhere. Others in the neighborhood began monitoring my family. They wanted to make sure the monster was put away for life. People I had known since I was a kid turned against us.
Restorative justice values and strives to honor the needs of everyone involved in the most humane ways possible and in a safe environment — those who commit crimes, and those who suffer from them. In so doing, it brings humanity back into the justice system. It converts a limited worldview based around isolation and individualism into a much more positive vision that is rooted in honesty, accountability, and the visible connection of causes with effects. And it works in concrete terms by drastically reducing recidivism and costs. Most important of all, it nurtures new relationships and a strong sense of human unity. In that sense, the root power of restorative justice is love expressed in action.
This is not to shy away from the need for accountability or regret. I cannot overstate the utter sadness that I and my family have felt for what happened ever since, the desire to take away the pain from my mom’s victim and those who love her. The empathy and care we felt and still feel has never had a chance to be fully seen or expressed given the shambles of a criminal justice system that pits people against one another to further detriment and destruction — not to mention the total lack of opportunities for a mentally ill person to try to communicate their authentic feelings and reach for accountability under the harrowing conditions of imprisonment, where they are denied proper psychiatric treatment. This has been a hex for us all.
My mom was put on trial in the spring of 1996. I testified that she was not a criminal, but has a mental illness. I stand by that to this day. The court was cold and bifurcating: divided aisles, and a mix of fear, judgment and unspoken hatred mingling in the air. The judge ruled that my mother did not belong in prison due to her illness, and she was sentenced to house arrest and stringent rules for probation. If she violated them, she’d face 15 years in jail. And that’s when the neighborhood witch hunt resumed in earnest.
In 1996 and 1997, the Probation Officer received slews of calls about my mother’s case, falsely reporting violations. One group of neighbors followed my family around like bloodhounds, and one day at a water aerobics class at the local YMCA they found out that her caretaker had gone back to the locker room because she had a cold. Although my mom was in the pool with other responsible adults, this was one of the things cited by the group as a violation of her probation.
She was summoned to a hearing and from there to prison to begin her sentence (the judge who had issued a clear ruling against incarceration at the initial trial was now up for a possible spot on the state Supreme Court, and this may have influenced his decision). I remember the day she was taken away very clearly. My father and I sat with her. “Molly, you have to live your life — go on,” she told me. That was the last time I saw her outside of prison until 2014. It was 1999. I was 29 years old.
I visited my mother at the Pocatello Women’s Correctional Center in Eastern Idaho, a dank university town with a strange oppression in the air. The prison is located as far as possible from most of Idaho’s other major cities, which is a common pattern in American society — to make it as hard as possible to keep up any kind of contact or relationship with incarcerated family members. My mom became another number, 48985 to be exact.
In the western world prisons have become de facto asylums. Data are very difficult to gather, but it’s estimated that over half the prison population in the USA are mentally ill. At Pocatello, female prisoners shared a host of human rights violations with me: one belly-chained at her child’s birth with an officer watching the whole proceedings. Others forced to strip naked and be probed in their vagina or anus on suspicion of hiding items. Women with babies and small children who were not allowed extended or overnight visits. Mentally ill prisoners like my mother who were punished in the ‘hole’ — placed in solitary confinement — for being honest about their symptoms. On and on, repeat ad nauseam.
In our failure to acknowledge everybody’s shadow side we act out our fears on the most vulnerable members of society. We scapegoat the mentally ill and treat them as though everything is their fault. We are unwilling to acknowledge the sickness that imprisons us in our own patterns of projection. Afraid to face the truth, we cannot enact true or lasting change. Transformation is only possible if we set ourselves free from these limitations and acknowledge the injustice that lies at the heart of the justice system.
My own work as an advocate for restorative justice emerged from these experiences. I saw needs go unmet for decades for everyone involved. I saw no chance of healing, or even of the slightest opening towards it in the prison system. I knew that what I’d experienced was the exact opposite of justice. Justice is respect and communication, and true accountability and reparation. It means distinguishing the individual as separate from their crime and the harm it has caused, and truthfully evaluating the unique conditions that inform a person’s actions. Justice is helping all people — including offenders — to be and feel accountable for what they have done, and to work together to make things right.
I can’t be anything but grateful for the opportunity to choose love over fear again and again throughout the last 25 years, and to live out that commitment in my work. I’ve done everything I can to respect and understand how my mother’s actions have affected others in the community, and to listen to the often ugly, revenge-based messages I’ve received from strangers. I know that housing 25 per cent of the world’s prisoners in American jails when only five per cent of the world’s population lives in the USA is both morally wrong and substantively ineffective as the basis for justice and reconciliation. I know that corporations with vested interests are passionate about filling every prison bed. I know that punishment only exacerbates the problem.
I know that stories like my mom’s must be held and heard safely to provide the raw material for healing. I know that people do not heal when they are pitted against each other and made to play a ruthless game of blame and shame. I know that by humanizing those stories we release the possibility of redemption, and come to understand our shared humanity. Without doubt, I know that restorative justice makes real the fact that conflict, pain, suffering and crime are part of all our existence. They constitute our shadow side.
Facing those shadows head on, naming them, and valuing people for who they are and not for the crimes they have committed, opens the way to offer a renewed sense of belonging to those we realize we have discarded. As Carl Jung once wrote, “if [we] only learn to deal with [our] own shadow [we] have done something real for the world. We have succeeded in shouldering at least an infinitesimal part of the gigantic, unsolved social problems of our day.”
This webinar was recorded on May 9th, 2025.
In this episode, social anthropologist and experienced mediator Deborah Heifetz will explore her groundbreaking Map to Compassion — a non-hierarchical framework recently published in MIT’s Journal of Awareness-Based Systems Change. She will guide us in understanding how we can sustain curiosity in environments dominated by fear and distrust. Drawing on over 30 years of global peacebuilding experience and somatic education, Heifetz illuminates how our developmental needs, culture, and tribal affiliations shape our emotional responses. Her emphasis on fairness over punitive justice aligns with Restorative Justice principles, inviting inquiry through the question: “What can be done to feel fairly treated?” This focus on fairness elicits deeper, more feelingful inquiries and reveals choices that support repair with the intent on rebuilding relationships and communities. Over many years, Heifetz has worked at the nexus of inner and outer peace. In this webinar, she will offer compassionate approaches to conflict resolution, providing practical tools for balancing emotionally charged needs during challenging times.
ABOUT DEBORAH:
Deborah Heifetz (she/her) is a social anthropologist, mediator, and professional facilitator with over 30 years of experience in peacebuilding, conflict resolution, and somatic education. She developed the systems-based model – the Human Needs Map, a circular matrix representing the interconnections between human needs at different levels of scale and reflecting the synergies and tensions between needs. Her model has been considered a breakthrough framework by founders of Human Needs Theory for its non-hierarchical approach to human needs and for the way human needs and emotions are tied to human development. A co-founder of BraveHearts International, she has worked globally in mediation, sustainability, and leadership training, integrating movement-based and somatic practices like Laban Movement Analysis and Somatic Experiencing with her knowledge and sensitivity for culture and community building. A Chevening Scholar, she recently published The Map to Compassion in MIT’s Journal for Awareness-Based Systems Change. Heifetz works at the nexus of inner and outer peace.
Website: https://heifetzmatrix.com/
HOSTED BY: Founder & Executive Producer Molly Rowan Leach (she/her), and Social Media and Marketing Manager Logan Ward (he/him).
ABOUT MOLLY: https://restorativejusticeontherise.org/about-us/host-executive-producer/
Molly’s writing: https://medium.com/@mollyleach
ABOUT LOGAN: https://www.loganward.net/about
Logan’s portfolio: https://www.loganward.net/
ABOUT RESTORATIVE JUSTICE ON THE RISE
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Author (Being Restorative, April 2024) and restorative practitioner Leaf Seligman invites us to the tenderness of humility, listening, and towards the values and principles that unite us as a humanity, as we face intense and urgent polarization and violence in our world. Our host Jabali Stewart of Huayruro, himself a martial artist of nonviolence and unification, weaves us in conversation to implore deepening inquiry into what this thing we call ‘restorative’ really is, how it makes its way into the world, and how it ameliorates connection and context.
Tenderness is often considered weak or scary, and yet it is itself a revolutionary act. Leaf’s work within prisons and communities, as well as her personal experiences as a partially sight-impaired person, illuminate the “lens” and approach to this work that grounds individuals much beyond the field of restorative justice, in times of great upheaval and disconnection. Tenderness is a powerful bridge that acknowledges the other, that asks also of accountability of self first, and of others, yet from an understanding of our global interrelationship as a baseline for life, and life well lived. And alongside her perspective, we keep in mind the indigenous of our world who came long before this movement, knowing we are related to all life, humans and animals, trees, waters, skies, and cosmos. With this there is honor in having responsibility to all. This awareness is welcomed throughout our dialogue.
Oftentimes it is easy to misunderstand restorative as only relating to conflict and the modern justice systems in our world, yet it is a much larger scope of practices that center our common humanity and ask us to hear from one another in ways that build or rebuild, reshaping trust and meaning, offering powerful and sustaining agency for change on every level imagined.
ABOUT
Leaf Seligman
Leaf Seligman is the author of Being Restorative which was published in April 2024 and is available from the publisher, Bauhan Publishing, and online retailers. Leaf considers herself a daughter of the trees, grateful to live in Maple Nation and be close enough to spend time among beloved copper beeches. She has taught in colleges, prisons, and community settings since 1985. As a restorative practitioner, Leaf draws on her experience as a jail chaplain, prisoner educator, congregational minister, college instructor, and human being. She facilitates peacekeeping circles, immersive learning experiences, and restorative processes of accountability, healing, and transformation. Leaf delights in bringing tenderness everywhere. Her previous books include Opening the Window: Sabbath Meditations, A Pocket Book of Prompts, and From the Midway: Unfolding Stories of Redemption and Belonging. She lives in New Hampshire.
Jabali Stewart
Jabali is an organizational consultant, a leadership coach, a public speaker, a youth worker, and a circle keeper. He has kept Peacemaking Circles in schools (K through College), businesses, families, government, and community settings. He has trained in and practices the lineage of Circle Keeping connected to Mark Wedge, Kay Pranis, Barry Stuart and Tahnaga Myers for over a decade. Besides Circle, he also practices other Art of Hosting and Participatory Leadership modalities. Jabali is a former independent school administrator, a public speaker, and has also cultivated a practice of one-on-one counsel. He enjoys collaborative problem-solving, and his work is deeply informed by his belief and practice of sensible, love-based leadership.
Find Jabali on Linkedin
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>>>We need your help! Support 15 Years of Global Independent Restorative Media Efforts Now
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This episode features Dr. Tema Okun who gives us a brief rundown of the characteristics of White Supremacy Culture, which can be understood in-depth on her website: www.whitesupremacyculture.info
Dr. Tema Okun offers her knowledge of relationships that people may have with White Supremacy Culture as well as suggestions to dismantle this broken system. We welcome listeners to step outside of thinking that these systems are working for us in any shape or form.
The live webinar was recorded on January 23rd, 2025 and it is hosted by Molly Rowan Leach, founder of RJotR, and Logan Ward, Restorative Justice on the Rise’s new Social Media Manager.
Logan then relates a statement from the website to his recently released documentary, Remarkable, Voices from the Trans Community, which covers the similar topic of objectivity’s irrelevance when in dialogue with oppressed (marked) and non-oppressed (unmarked) groups.
Logan’s film can be found on Youtube: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0PpjhMnVsFk
And the subsequent discussion space can both be found on his website: https://www.loganward.net/film
Key notes from this episode:
Dr. Tema Okun recommends that if we are going to engage in restorative justice work we need a:
The instructions from Tema’s mother are:
ABOUT
Tema Okun
Dr. Okun has spent over 40 years working with and for organizations, schools, and community-based institutions as an educator, facilitator, and coach focused on issues of racial justice and equity. She currently facilitates, consults, mentors, and offers talks for and with leaders and organizations locally and nationwide.
She is the author of the award-winning The Emperor Has No Clothes: Teaching About Race and Racism to People Who Don’t Want to Know (2010, IAP) and the widely used article White Supremacy Culture. She has published a revised version of this article on an extended and expanded website at www.whitesupremacyculture.info
Tema is a fierce Jewish advocate for Palestine solidarity as a member of the Triangle Chapter of Jewish Voice for Peace. She is on the board of the Unitarian Universalist Service Committee and belongs to the Bhumisphara Sangha under the leadership of Lama Rod Owens. She is a graduate of the Spiritual Guidance Training Institute. She is an artist, a poet, and a writer. She lives in Durham NC where she is fortunate to reside among beloved community. Her current project is deepening her ability to love her neighbor as herself. She is finding the instruction easy and the follow through challenging, given how we live in a culture that is afraid to help us do either or both.
Reach her on Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/tema-okun-0a14311a1
Logan Ward
Logan Ward (he/him) is an illustrator, writer, and filmmaker who values dialogue, challenging societal norms, and mutual respect. He graduated with a master’s in Media Design in August 2024, where he studied community-centered and participatory approaches to research and design.
Reach him on Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/logan-ward-860620218/
Check out his illustrations on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/l.ward.draws/
And also on his website: https://www.loganward.net/
ABOUT RESTORATIVE JUSTICE ON THE RISE
>>>We need your help! Support 15 Years of Global Independent Restorative Media Efforts Now
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**Disclaimer** Audio was recorded with limited resources, please listen with good headphones to properly hear the valuable information in this episode.
recorded at Expanding Restorative Justice in Oregon in 2021.
In 2021, the Criminal Justice Commission created rules regarding the administration of the Restorative Justice Grant Program. Those rules require applicants to propose community based restorative justice programs that serve as alternatives to prosecution. This requirement is in alignment with best practices from across the country that speak to the importance of community held restorative justice programs.
This panel discussion will explore the importance of keeping restorative justice programs based in community and separate from the criminal legal process. Panelists will provide background on their experiences with community based restorative justice programs and will speak to the critical differences between the restorative and punitive approaches to harm.
Danielle DeCant
Deputy District Attorney in Hood River County
Member of Circles of Peace Advisory Team in the Columbia River Gorge
danielle.decant@hoodrivercounty.gov
Debra Pennington-Davis
Circles of Peace Program/Six Rivers Dispute Resolution Center
Restorative Justice Coordinator
Laura Diamond (She/her)
Conflict Artistry LLC
Co-owner, Coordinator, Facilitator
Emily B. Naylor
Emerging Adult Program / Community Solutions of Central Oregon
Restorative Justice Specialist & Lead Facilitator
In Partnership with:
Restorative Justice Coalition of Oregon
RJCO is a coalition of Oregon restorative justice practitioners and programs.
We promote and support the implementation and practice of restorative justice principles and models in Oregon’s justice, law enforcement, educational and other community institutions.
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with Shaylie Pickrell
Director of Operations & Infrastructure, RJ Facilitator - Restorative Roots Project (PDX, OR, USA)
In this 1:15h episode, we drop deeply into the concept that our greatest losses might just be our greatest powers to serve our communities, and our world.
We explore key topics such as:
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For anyone questioning the viability of restorative justice as an alternative to violent crime prosecution, here's your evidence. Join us for a conversation that is inspiring and informative.
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Joe and Marg hit the ground running in their typical fun, informative style that has won the hearts and minds of thousands worldwide, sharing potent insights as they discuss the birth of their new book, and the reasons for its existence.
Tune in to hear all about the following key points and more:
Behavior development not behavior management
The role of the brain
Allostasis
Brain as predictor not as responder
Sensory input and past experiences as self-perpetuating
Fight flight freeze faint are preparations
Responding, not reacting, to trauma
Unlearning our socialization of punishment
“PBIS”: what’s wrong with it, where it came from (Levoss)
Managing each other’s body-budget
Connection-orientation as driver
Co-Regulating or Co-Escalating
Code Switching and adaptation to environment
The myth of lowered expectations when RJE is introduced
Neural pathways and brain re-structuring
Transactional or Transformational
If you are in the problem, you should be included in the decision making
Restorative starts with us
Ako, the teacher is also the student (New Zealand word)
Prevention-focused instead of trained as conflict/behavior system
Cues of relationship
Cues of safety
Relationship block - 20 m comm building circles
Shame’s role...and much more
ABOUT RESTORATIVE JUSTICE ON THE RISE
The world's first restorative justice podcast and public lives platform, since 2011
The Redemption Project Discussion Series in alliance with Van Jones & REFORM/CNN
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This feature panel discussion is in collaboration with the Restorative Rainbow Alliance, Restorative Justice on The Rise, and Director and Producer Logan Ward to uplift the incredible film: Remarkable: Voices From The Trans Community. {Watch Now}
In this conversation we get to hear from trans man and creator of the film, Logan Ward, as well as a major voice in the film, Hami Samba, who both share about the comfort they found in being able to tell their own narratives. Logan's film illustrates distrust towards the trans community and proposes that community-centered and participatory practices could assist in rebuilding that trust.
All of these ideas are discussed, and the RRA's restorative justice and queer lens helps us consider these ideas within context.
In addition, we want to highlight the RRA's code of conduct, and their overall efforts, within the restorative justice field.
Please let us know if you'd like to contact any/all of our panelists for possible engagement in your community! To contact Logan Ward directly, click here
Length: 1:12
REMARKABLE on Insta: www.instagram.com/remarkablefilm
Restorative Rainbow Alliance: https://www.restorativerainbowalliance.org
***
Restorative Justice on The Rise is the very first live and standard podcast since 2011 focusing on Restorative Justice and Peacebuilding, from the personal to collective, demonstrating powerful stories, cases, and insights from a robust range of diverse voices, and reaching every continent in our world. We can be found on Apple Podcasts and Spotify, and our collaboration for this podcast episode is a result of our Fellowship status with the Salzburg Global Media Academy, a program forging critical pathways forward in the age of AI.
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Media That Matters:
Public Dialogue On Justice
Restorative Justice on the Rise is an international live dialogue via Webcast and Telecouncil platform that reaches an international constituency of invididuals, organizations, professionals, academics, practitioners, and more. The mission is to provide connection, advocacy, education and inspired action as a public service to individuals and communities seeking to proactively improve relationships and structures within their spheres and our world.